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They rarely told me much that mattered about a person, anyway (if you aren’t attracted to someone, for instance, who cares if you are both into the same fan fiction? On Tinder, bios were often brief, sometimes just a few lines and a bunch of emoji — and I was fine with that. encourages us to play ‘hot or not’ and consider how attracted we are to someone’s profile,” says Allison Moon, a queer sex educator and the author of .

Everyone got a quick glance, and my only criteria was whom I felt attracted to. Do enough swiping, and sooner or later you start to develop a sense of what you like.

Landwirth and Vidal matched on the same day Vidal downloaded the app.

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“I didn’t know how to flirt with a guy.” But on Tinder, Landwirth says, he could finally just relax, because the app took some of the guesswork out of things.

There was no fear he’d be hitting on a straight guy — which meant he could finally focus on figuring out who he was attracted to, and whether they were interested in him. I was able to let loose,” he says, “to try the lamest pickup lines or do some serious flirting.” Plus, having these exchanges on the internet felt less intimidating than interacting with someone face-to-face.

As far as I’m concerned, that’s not bad for a free app.

The saying goes that men are from Mars, while women are from Venus.

Both are now completely “out.” Tinder, they say, helped them get there. And as far as most people were concerned, I was a straight woman.